In the pages of an old notebook

I was flicking through the pages of an old notebook. This is what I stumbled upon from September last year. It’s lots of disjointed thoughts. But an accurate snapshot into my life. It is more questions than answers.

Attention is what allows things to grow

A few months ago, I signed up for an online writing course. Hummingbird sessions by Emily Stoddard. It’s a series of short writing prompts. Each session is about 15mins long. I found great value in the first twenty or so sessions. Then it slipped out of my routine. I’ve been thinking about picking it back up again. A short writing session would be a good way to start my days.

What catches my thoughts today?

I sweep salt crystals and taco titbits from the table to the floor. The remnants of last night’s dinner. It’s a new day. The shower is still fresh on my skin. Sleep clings to my blood. There is a slight congestion through my nostrils. Dust and pollen enliven my system.

What assistance can I call upon to clear my circulation?
I hold a cup of tea and the warmth helps everything.

The sun enters my awareness. I have lived a thousand mornings, just like this one. There is beauty in the repetition of the everyday. Caffeine from the tea leaves creeps into my cheeks. I feel my weight as I collapse into a chair. The body is the centre.

Morning pages

I follow the free association of my brain. I do not know where it will lead. I believe poetic success will be found by diligence, study, consistency, perseverance, and energetic inspiration. Where are my anchors?

But the brain seeks comfort and easy rewards. The tools I develop to survive are not the same as the ones that help me thrive. The hardwiring of my brain is the source of these habits. I want quick rewards, scrolling, watching shows, video games. Why do they creep?

Alignment

I want to align myself with people and activities that nourish a creative practice. Showing up is the hardest part. How can I show up on the hard days?
Writing is a lifelong study. How can I introduce a pattern interruption when I am in the middle of an activity that doesn’t contribute to my goals?

Write the goal on a piece of paper and pin it to the wall. Keep it within eyesight.

Organization is another area where I can improve. I am thinking about what it looks like to seek discomfort. Why do I resist doing the work that is good for me?

Output is the best way to create something great. Keep producing work and something good will come.